A bride on her wedding night says to her husband, "I must confess darling, I used to be a hooker." He says, "That's a bit of a shock dear, but I must admit, I find it quite erotic. Tell me about it." She replies, "Well, my name was Nigel, and I played for Wigan!"
"Two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I am not yet completely sure about the universe." – Albert Einstein
A soldier ran up to a nun. Out of breath he asked, "Please, may I hide under your skirt. I'll explain later."
The nun agreed...
A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked, "Sister, have you seen a soldier?"
The nun replied, "He went that way."
After the MPs ran off, the soldier crawled out from under her skirt and said, "I can't thank you enough, sister. You see, I don't want to go to Syria."
The nun said, "I understand completely."
The soldier added, "I hope I'm not rude, but you have a great pair of legs!"
The nun replied, "If you had looked a little higher, you would have seen a great pair of balls…. I don't want to go to Syria either."
"Two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I am not yet completely sure about the universe." – Albert Einstein
I am going to have to take a break from posting in here for a while .
I have been diagnosed with a severe case of peekaboo disease
And i will be in ICU for a while
"Two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I am not yet completely sure about the universe." – Albert Einstein