A little light humour

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IslandPink
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#2026 Re: A little light humour

Post by IslandPink »

Spike Gilligan on punctuation -
"What is this thing called Love ? " ( Cole Porter )
or
"What is this thing called, love ? "
"Peridots and periwinkle, blue medallions Gilded galleons spilled across the ocean floor" ( Mitchell )
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IslandPink
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#2027 Re: A little light humour

Post by IslandPink »

Spot the random animal, in this clickbait story I just visited courtesy of the Daily Express :
Bison.JPG
Bison.JPG (60.11 KiB) Viewed 637 times
"Peridots and periwinkle, blue medallions Gilded galleons spilled across the ocean floor" ( Mitchell )
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Nick
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#2028 Re: A little light humour

Post by Nick »

Also the little known eye spider "or cobwebs that drift"
Little known fact, coherent thought can destructively interfere with itself leaving no thought at all, that’s why I prefer incoherent thought.
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The Stratmangler
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#2029 Re: A little light humour

Post by The Stratmangler »

Field of Bison?

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Chris :happy3:
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andrew Ivimey
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#2030 Re: A little light humour

Post by andrew Ivimey »

I'm still enjoying the pedants' revolt. Don't get the buffalos....crikey! My spell check tried three times to make it '...buffalo's'. Now where's the sense in that! Where's my axe?
Philosophers have only interpreted the world - the point, however, is to change it. No it isn't ... maybe we should leave it alone for a while.
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#2031 Re: A little light humour

Post by IslandPink »

Perhaps you've got blurred or patchy eye vision. Like Long John Silver.
"Peridots and periwinkle, blue medallions Gilded galleons spilled across the ocean floor" ( Mitchell )
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Dave the bass
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#2032 Re: A little light humour

Post by Dave the bass »

I've had Retinal Migraines recently, they're amazing! Really.

No headache as such, just the most amazing intense light show in one eye whether its open or closed. 2nd time it happened I just sat back and enjoyed the show. :happy10: 10- 15 mins of cor, followed by not being able to see much out of one eye then its all back to normal. Erks!
"The fat bourgeois and his doppelganger"
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andrew Ivimey
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#2033 Re: A little light humour

Post by andrew Ivimey »

Nah, pieces if eight!
Philosophers have only interpreted the world - the point, however, is to change it. No it isn't ... maybe we should leave it alone for a while.
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#2034 Re: A little light humour

Post by andrew Ivimey »

Of 8, now I am as lost as a shipwrecked then marooned wretched soul on a desert island in one of the nine seas of Brontitaur 2 which has an eccentric orbit of betelgeuse.
Philosophers have only interpreted the world - the point, however, is to change it. No it isn't ... maybe we should leave it alone for a while.
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#2035 Re: A little light humour

Post by Dave the bass »

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"The fat bourgeois and his doppelganger"
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andrew Ivimey
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#2036 Re: A little light humour

Post by andrew Ivimey »

Okay that makes me laugh. And if an Audiologist held an otoscope like that they'd be shot at dawn.
.well okay, told not to do so, or rather asked what might be improved with their otoscopic practice or ... no one cares because we all died of covid but I still don't get the buffalo reference.
Philosophers have only interpreted the world - the point, however, is to change it. No it isn't ... maybe we should leave it alone for a while.
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#2037 Re: A little light humour

Post by IslandPink »

Well it wasn't buffalo, but you did see the line 'Shapes floating in your field of Bison' ?
"Peridots and periwinkle, blue medallions Gilded galleons spilled across the ocean floor" ( Mitchell )
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#2038 Re: A little light humour

Post by jack »

From the Rotherham Advertiser:

Buttock Tattoo Terror Lands Rotherham Pair In Hospital

A furious row has broken out between a local tattoo artist and his client after what started out as a routine inking session, left both of them requiring emergency hospital treatment. Vintage film fan and part time plus size model Tracey Munter (23), had visited the Ink It Good Tattoo Emporium on Wellgate last week to have the finishing touches applied to a double buttock representation of the chariot race scene from the iconic 1959 film, Ben Hur.

Tattooist Jason Burns takes up the story. “It was a big job in more ways than one.” he told us “I’d just lit a roll up and was finishing off a centurions helmet. It’s delicate, close up work. Next thing is, I sense a slight ripple in the buttock cleavage area just around Charlton Heston’s whip, and a hissing sound – more of a whoosh than a rasp – and before I know what’s happening, there’s a flame shooting from her pineapple to my fag and my beards gone up like an Aussie bush fire. ”Jason says he rushed to the studio sink to quell the flames, only to turn round and see Tracey frantically fanning her buttock area with a damp towel.

The flames had travelled down the gas cloud and set fire to her thong which was smoking like a cheap firework. “To be honest”, said Jason, “I didn’t even realise she was wearing one. You’d need a sodding mining licence and a torch to find out for sure. She could have had a complete wardrobe in there and I’d have been none the wiser.” Jason and Tracey were taken to Rotherham District Hospital accident and emergency department where they were treated for minor burns and shock. Both are adamant that the other is to blame.

“I’m furious” said Jason, “I’ve got a face like a mange-ridden dog and my left eyebrow's not there any more. I don’t know about Ben Hur – Gone With The Wind’s more like it. You don’t just let rip in someone’s face like that. It’s dangerous.” But Tracey remains both angry and unrepentant; “I’m still in agony,” she said, “and Charlton Heston looks more like Sidney bloody Poitier now. Jason shouldn’t have had a fag on the go and there’s no way I’d guff on purpose. He’d had me on all fours for nearly an hour. I can only put up with that for so long before nature takes its course. My Kev knows that. I give him my five second warning and I’d have done the same for Jason, but I didn’t get chance – it just crept out.”

Ted Walters from the South Yorkshire Fire and Rescue service wasn’t surprised when we told him what had happened “People just don’t appreciate the dangers. “ he told us, “We get called out to more flatulence ignition incidents than kitchen fires these days, now people have moved over to oven chips. We have a slogan ‘Flame ‘n fart – keep ’em apart’. Anyone engaging in an pineapple inking scenario would do well to bear that in mind in future.'
Vivitur ingenio, caetera mortis erunt
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andrew Ivimey
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#2039 Re: A little light humour

Post by andrew Ivimey »

Hi Mark, Nope

Hi Jack, erm.....
Philosophers have only interpreted the world - the point, however, is to change it. No it isn't ... maybe we should leave it alone for a while.
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#2040 Re: A little light humour

Post by The Stratmangler »

andrew Ivimey wrote: Mon Aug 16, 2021 7:23 pm I'm still enjoying the pedants' revolt. Don't get the buffalos....crikey! My spell check tried three times to make it '...buffalo's'. Now where's the sense in that! Where's my axe?
Dem's Bison.
Deze is Buffalo's

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Chris :happy3:
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