A little light humour

A place for the funny stuff
Michael L
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#1291 Re: A little light humour

Post by Michael L »

Mike H wrote: Tue May 09, 2017 11:56 pm Arrgh no not that was asked to join that once, 2 days was enough had to cancel it, endless emails from total strangers wanting to invite me. With apologies to fans of LinkedIn. :(
Yes I was pestered too. PITA
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jack
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#1292 Re: A little light humour

Post by jack »

Michael L wrote: Wed May 10, 2017 4:50 am
Mike H wrote: Tue May 09, 2017 11:56 pm Arrgh no not that was asked to join that once, 2 days was enough had to cancel it, endless emails from total strangers wanting to invite me. With apologies to fans of LinkedIn. :(
Yes I was pestered too. PITA
LinkedIn serves a purpose. I never accept connections unless they come from someone I know directly or a 2nd level connection.

As a BUSINESS network, it's very very useful. It's not "Facebook for business" - it's the equivalent of business cards - very very useful if you;re looking for a new job of looking for staff - a recruiter's dream.

Anyway, I failed to notice that the link I provided required you to log in, so here's the text:
A friend of mine has 2 ringside tickets for the Joshua v klitschko fight.

He paid £2500 each but he didn't realise when he bought them it was on the same day as his wedding,

If you're interested he is looking for someone to take his place.

It's at St Ignatious Church in Lancashire at 3pm the brides name is Julie she's 5'4" about 115lbs she's a good cook too. She will be the one in the white dress.
Vivitur ingenio, caetera mortis erunt
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Mike H
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#1293 Re: A little light humour

Post by Mike H »

:lol:



From Renault forums - just now:

Re: Radio BT for Google Assistant
Is there a button I can push, or any way I can activate my phone's Google Assistant (the equivalent to Siri)? My radio is this one: *link*


Re: Behave
*link: Radio BT for Google Assistant*

Why !

Alexa, can you 'eff off !
Siri, stick your head in a bucket !
Cortana, Up yours !
Google, get out of my phone !

I don't want or need a disembodied voice in the car, house, supermarket or anywhere else telling me things......
I have enough of that with 'er indoors !

"Why aren't you in third gear?"
"Cos I'm happy in second"
Isn't the right answer BTW :D


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"No matter how fast light travels it finds that the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it."
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Ali Tait
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#1294 Re: A little light humour

Post by Ali Tait »

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Mike H
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#1295 Re: A little light humour

Post by Mike H »

Excellent! :lol:
 
"No matter how fast light travels it finds that the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it."
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Mike H
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#1296 Re: A little light humour

Post by Mike H »

Another guffaw from Renault forums - yes I know like buses :D



Name: FN
Platinum member


Quote:
Originally Posted by DD
It's never a proper party till you wake up in another city and not a clue how you got there
/Quote:

A neurosurgeon I know comes from a town near Warsaw, lives & works in Sweden. Once upon a time he got an urgent phone call while partying with his friends on his short vacation.
- There's been an accident, we're waiting for you, you're operating, where are you.
- Been drinking, can't drive.
- No problem, get a taxi.
- Ok, but won't get sober soon enough...
- No problem, we'll get you up & running in no time, you'll get IV with glucose, insulin and potassium and you'll be like a newborn.
- OK, I'll just get my coat and say goodbye to the party...

Hangs up. Opens the pub's door. Closes the door. Rings back the hospital.
- I'm in Cracow...
 
"No matter how fast light travels it finds that the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it."
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cressy
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#1297 Re: A little light humour

Post by cressy »

I spat my tea out when I saw this......

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Mike H
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#1298 Re: A little light humour

Post by Mike H »

:lol:
 
"No matter how fast light travels it finds that the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it."
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Mike H
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#1299 Re: A little light humour

Post by Mike H »

 
"No matter how fast light travels it finds that the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it."
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Nick
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#1300 Re: A little light humour

Post by Nick »

Whenever an honest man discovers that he's mistaken, he will either cease to be mistaken or he will cease to be honest.
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ed
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#1301 Re: A little light humour

Post by ed »

nummer 24, she a bitch!, damn sho
There's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be
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Nick
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#1302 Re: A little light humour

Post by Nick »

Typical example of blues song structure:

It's been a hard day's night, and I been working like a dog
It's been a hard day's night, I should be sleeping like a log
But when I get home to you I'll find the things that you do
Will make me feel alright
Whenever an honest man discovers that he's mistaken, he will either cease to be mistaken or he will cease to be honest.
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Dave the bass
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#1303 Re: A little light humour

Post by Dave the bass »

The secret formula, don't let anyone see it OK.

The first line of the blues is always sung a second time,
Yeah, the first line of the blues is always sung a second time,
So by the time you get to the third line you've had time to think of a rhyme.
"The fat bourgeois and his doppelganger"
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IslandPink
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#1304 Re: A little light humour

Post by IslandPink »

God you just reminded me why I was stopped in my tracks in the Merrion centre Leeds c.1985 by 'Sailin Shoes' - I must play 'Cat Fever' at Owston some time - one of my top 20 tracks of anyone all time no question (s asked ) how could anybody construct such a fantastic thing ??
"Once you find out ... the Circumstances ; then you can go out"
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Dave the bass
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#1305 Re: A little light humour

Post by Dave the bass »

This whelk trawler. Owned by a Gong fan?

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"The fat bourgeois and his doppelganger"
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